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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:44 pm 
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Artie60438 wrote:
What kind of "Marine" would have to use sock puppets on a message board. Is today "dress up" day,homebound hermit?


Since I'm in a good mood, I'll humor the little troll and explain it using a story I was taught a long time ago.

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a U.S. Marine Corps base. He goes to the front gate, and says to the sentry, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?"

To his surprise, the Marines accept him enthusiastically. They feed him at the officer's club, they fix his car at the motor pool, and they even allow him to sleep in the VIP quarters.

But, as the man tries to fall asleep that night, he hears a strange sound. All through the night, he hears this sound.

The next morning, he asks the Marines what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a Marine."

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.

Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same Marine Corps base. Again the Marines accept him enthusiastically, fix his car, and allows him to stay in the VIP quarters. That night, he hears the exact same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the Marines reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a Marine."

The man says, "All right, all right. I'm *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a Marine, how do I become one?"

The Marines reply, "You must go to Paris Island, there to undergo several weeks of torturous behavior. You will be yelled at, put down, cut down, and physically exhausted. From there you will go on to receive infantry training. You will learn how to fight, fight to survive, and fight to win. You will learn how to act the Corps, breath the Corps, eat the Corps, sleep the Corps, be the Corps. When you finish these trials, you will be a Marine."

The man sets about his task. He goes through boot camp, advanced infantry training, and is assigned to an MEU. While part of the MEU he is sent to fight in two small wars, and three "police actions."

Three years later, while on leave, he returns to the Marine Corps base where he last heard that strange, strange sound. Standing there in his dress uniform, he says, "I have joined the Corps, and I have paid my dues. I have fought for the love of God, Country, and the Corps.

The Marines reply, "Congratulations. You are now a Marine. We shall now show you the way to the sound."

The Marines lead the man to a wooden door, where the Base Commander says, "The sound is right behind that door."

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, "Real funny. may I have the key?"

The Base Commander give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door.

The Commander give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the Commander, who provides it. Behind that door is *another* door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, amethyst...

Finally, the Commander says, "This is the last key to the last door."

The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.

But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a Marine.










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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:48 pm 
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USMarine wrote:
Artie60438 wrote:
What kind of "Marine" would have to use sock puppets on a message board. Is today "dress up" day,homebound hermit?


Since I'm in a good mood, I'll humor the little troll and explain it using a story I was taught a long time ago.


It's a shame you were never taught how to make friends or leave your house,homebound hermit.

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:54 pm 
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At the end of the night a Marine leaves a bar.

Outside he sees a nun. He walks over to her and slaps her in the face. Then he punches her in the stomach and knocks her over.

He proceeds to kick her several times and when he's done he bends down to her and says, "Not as tough as a Marine, are you Batman?"


:lol:

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 6:09 pm 
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Here are 7,856 theme songs from what has to be every television show ever all wrapped up nicely for your listening and free-downloading pleasure.

http://www.televisiontunes.com/index.php

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 6:23 pm 
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The 10 Hottest Jessica Biel Videos Of All Time

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:03 pm 
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I'm starving for a corndog with some yellow mustard.

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Sun Aug 23, 2009 4:56 pm 
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The 6 Main Reasons Why Most Pro Athletes Go Broke

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Sun Aug 23, 2009 5:56 pm 
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Star Wars Trash Compactor Bookends Statue

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2009 5:09 pm 
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-={ARCLIGHT}=- wrote:
This is awesome...but $199.00?

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Sun Aug 30, 2009 5:04 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 5:01 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 5:11 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Thu Nov 12, 2009 6:25 pm 
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-={ARCLIGHT}=- wrote:


AHA..... :lol:

1: Colt M1911

I can take one apart and put it back together then chamber a round in total darkness.


:smt006

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 7:18 pm 
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Man revenge rapes son’s rapist

Edited 02 December, 2009, 21:07

An Azerbaijani man has come up with an unorthodox way of getting even with a pedophile who raped his son. He tracked down the rapist, sexually assaulted him on camera, and distributed the footage.

While investigating a case of underage pornography distribution, the police of Azeri capital Baku stumbled upon a bewildering case of vigilantism, writes aysor.am news site citing local media reports.

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 Post subject: Re: OFF TOPIC !!!
PostPosted: Mon Dec 07, 2009 12:19 pm 
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10 Things From Your Twenties You’ll Regret When You’re Forty

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